If you’ve ever suffered with depression, you will know that negative thoughts can feel like they’re taking over your brain. It’s not just a symptom of depression; it’s also part of what keeps the cycle going. So, how do these negative thoughts begin, and what can we do to change them? I want to explain how these patterns may develop and share some practical ways to challenge and to work on changing them.
How Negative Thoughts Begin
Negative thoughts don’t just appear out of nowhere. They often develop over time and can slowly take over how we see ourselves and the world around us. There are several factors that might lead to some people thinking more negatively…
1. Cognitive Vulnerability
Cognitive vulnerability is a fancy way of saying that some people are more prone to thinking negatively. This can come from a mix of things like genetics, early life experiences, or stressful events. If you’ve faced a lot of difficulties or trauma, you might be more likely to view things through a negative lens.
2. Cognitive Distortions
Cognitive distortions are biased ways of thinking that make everything seem worse than it is. Some common ones are:
All-or-Nothing thinking: Seeing things in black-and-white terms. For example, “If I don’t get the job, I’m a complete failure.”
Overgeneralisation: Taking one negative event and making it a rule for everything. Like, “I didn’t get that promotion, so I’ll never get ahead.”
Mental filter: Focusing only on the bad stuff and ignoring the good. For instance, “I got one bad comment, so the whole presentation was a disaster.”
Catastrophising: Imagining the worst possible outcome. For example, “If I mess up, I’ll get fired and never find another job.”
3. Self-Fulfilling Prophecies
Sometimes, if we believe something negative about ourselves, we might act in ways that make it come true. For instance, thinking you don’t have much to offer/aren’t much fun, might make you pull away from friends, which can make you feel even more lonely and unlovable.
How to Tackle Negative Thoughts
Understanding where these negative thoughts come from is useful, which you can do by being curious and using self-reflection, or you can work with a therapist to uncover the why. Now here are some ideas how you can work on changing them:
1. Try Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT)
CBT is a therapy that helps you spot and challenge those negative thoughts. It’s all about:
Thought records: Writing down what you’re thinking, finding the distortions, and challenging them with facts.
Behavioural experiments: Testing your beliefs in real life to see if they hold up.
2. Reframe Your Thoughts
Reframing means looking at a situation from a different angle. For example:
Find evidence: What proof do you have that your negative thought is true or not true?
Consider alternatives: Are there other ways to view the situation?
4. Be Kind to Yourself
Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a friend. Self-compassion involves:
Being kind: Speaking to yourself gently, especially when you’re struggling
Remembering that you are human: Knowing that everyone makes mistakes and experiences challenges
5. Do Things You Enjoy
Do things that make you feel good. Engaging in positive activities can help shift your focus away from negative thoughts and give you a much-needed boost.
Negative thoughts can be extremely hard to deal with, but knowing where they come from and how to challenge them can help you start to change your thinking. Whether you’re using therapy, mindfulness, or just being kinder to yourself, it’s possible to shift away from negative thought patterns.
If you’re struggling with depression, reaching out to a mental health professional can provide the support you need. Remember, you don’t have to face this alone, and with the right tools and help, you can break free from those negative thoughts.
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